hot cocoa, a mop, and a fire alarm.......

Here is a glimpse into my Sunday morning.......

7:00 am I wake up and have a strong craving for hot cocoa since it was twelve degrees below zero in my house. 

7:10 am I stay in bed under my heating blanket trying to decide whether i am going make hot cocoa with the powder mix and water in the microwave or if I would channel my inner Martha Stewart and make it on the stove top with milk and extra ingredients. 

7:20 am I actually get my Martha self out of bed and start on my Cocoa making task....because after all I am an over achiever and water and powder was just not going to cut it. 

*** Side note: please remember that I also need to get ready for Church and I have to be there at 8 am.......fully dressed and ready for a four hour marathon of smiles and worship***

7:30 am Pot is on the stove, and at this moment I decide that I want to bless others at church by bringing them Hot Cocoa.....Martha Style......so i fill it up with milk and cocoa mix....heat it up and stir away with a huge "look at me....and how domestic I am becoming" smile on my face.  

7:40 am  It is at this time that I realize.... I am not ready to leave yet and this hot cocoa is not going to be so hot if I pour it into cups..... so in my infinite cooking wisdom.... I decide to add some chocolate syrup and marshmallows to the already full pot and turn the heat down to low... and get myself ready to go. 

7:50 am I am putting the finishing touches on my Sunday Best......and I think "maybe I should check on my hot cocoa and see if the marshmallows melted" 

7:50 and 4 seconds: I meet my cat Norm in the hallway and he has a worried look on his face which concerns me because Norm only has two looks (I am hungry, and I just did something that could cause you to yell at me) never once have seen the worry look before. I walk into my kitchen to see something that will change my life forever. 

7:50 and 10 seconds: Upon entering my kitchen, I was welcomed with bubbling hot cocoa spewing all over my floor, ceiling, stove top, and myself.... followed by the chorus of the fire alarm going off in my hallway... and the scent of not only failure, but burnt hot cocoa and marshmallows.  Martha would be very upset..... 

7:51 am: I pull myself together and turn into a cocoa cleaning beast.... as if I were saving a life with my bare hands. I turn off the stove, throw my charred pot into the sink with running water, beat my fire alarm with a broom, and run to get the mop. 

7:52 am: I run back into the kitchen to find Norm sampling some of the cocoa failure on the floor... I am a little worried and yet kind of curious if he likes it or not...... I kick Norm away from his tasting and mop up the rest of the cocoa failure off of the floor. 

7:55 am: I pull myself together (by that I mean... I try to get the charred cocoa smell out of my hair and clothes) to get ready to smile and worship. 

8:00 am: Purse in hand and smile on my face, I head for the door.... only to be greeted with a pile of puke the size of my head from Norm who must now be lactose intolerant or my cocoa failure must not have been as good as he once thought. 

All of that in less than an hour..........

I learned three things from that experience:

1. Martha Steward would not attempt to do something so adventurous that early in the morning....so I should not attempt to do so either. Best to stick with microwave and mediocre cocoa. 

2. Low on my stove is code word for high.... therefore much like small children.... and cats..... my stove should never be left unattended. 

3. Contrary to popular belief and children's books.... cats and milk don't always mix and could result in giant messes that need to be picked up while you are wearing heels and a smile.