Search me..... Psalm 139:23-24

Psalm 139:23-24 (New Living Translation)

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 Point out anything in me that offends you,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

Imagine telling somebody to "search your life" and after they are done searching your life asking them to test those things that cause anxiety and then point out things in your life that offend you. That person would take one look at you and think you are crazy. Why? Because how many of us are really ready to have our lives searched? How many of us are ready for somebody to dig through our dirty laundry and point out the offensive things in our lives? Can you imagine your deepest darkest secrets revealed to your friend? I would be mortified if my whole life was searched and under a microscope. There are things in my life that I am not proud of at all and that I try to hide from myself. I say my life is an open book..but honestly I have probably ripped out some pages before opening it for people to read.

This scripture is powerful and uncomfortable all at the same time. It causes you to feel anxious and free all at the same time. This scripture isn't just talking about "somebody" this scripture is talking about the one who created you. We say all the time that you can't hide anything from God. We even point out how funny it was that Adam and Eve were hiding their nakedness from God because they didn't want God to know what they did. The truth is .... even though we know we can't hide from God... many times we try to hide things from ourselves.

There is a reason we call them deep dark secrets. We keep those things we don't want to be found in deep dark places. Places we don't think we will ever find them... let alone somebody else. This scripture calls us to go to those deep dark places... and bring God along.

Its as if we are standing on a cliff and the only thing that is standing in our way from true freedom and everlasting life...... is allowing God to search those deep dark places and point out how to deal with the nasty things we have in our lives that stand in our way from the journey we need to be on.

This scripture has been on my desk for several months... and I have forgotten it. It is part of a daily inventory that I wanted to do everyday to help me focus... and instead of focusing on it... I shoved it into a deep dark place.

The daily inventory is a very powerful process. You are to ask yourself (search within yourself) these questions:
1. How am I doing loving my neighbor? Did I act in an unloving way toward anyone today?
2. How am I doing at loving my Lord?
3. Did others see in me today the joy of having a personal relationship with Christ? If not, why not?
4. How was my peace today? Did anything happen that caused me to lose it? What was my part in it?
5. Was I patient today? What caused me to lose my patience? Do I owe anybody an apology?
6. Woud anyone say that I was kind today? In what ways did I act unkind?
7. Did I keep my word with everyone today?
8. Did I lose my temper or speak a harsh or unkind word to someone?
9. Am I hiding anything from myself or others because its just easier not to talk about it?
10. Where in my life am I trying to control a situation or other person?

WOW..... these are tough but powerful questions.

I pray that we are all open to search ourselves and allow God to search us as well. Looking at our junk is not fun... but it stands in the way of our everlasting life that we are called to live.